is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
While she was crying about breaking up, he looked at her through his fork and said "of course she's upset, she's in jail." Having sex with him tonight.
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
where are you?
sonic
Good. I hungoveredly cleaned your room. This is what being married is going to be like. I pick the condoms up off the floor and you bring home the hot dogs.
First date. He's wearing a tuxedo shirt and keeps asking me about our future children. Escape plan #3 is now in action...
We somehow managed to get the sumo-wrestler costume into the washing machine, but I don't think the cupcake icing completely came off... And it still smells like tequila.
All I got from that conversation with the officer was "blah blah blah, you're disgusting, blah blah blah, $500 fine, blah blah blah, be in court Tuesday."
His dick is longer than my foot and I'm a size 9. I'm literally kicking myself in the vagina
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
You gotta have 1 orgasm for me and the rest can be for you. I'm living vicariously through you 😂
I just want you to know you're the worst sister ever.
If this is about me and your ex, it's not my fault she doesn't like men.
I realized today that the only things I'm guaranteed to have with me at all times are lipgloss, condoms and a USB drive. hmmm...
Randomize
