it hurts more in the daytime
as soon as his mom opened the door to let me in the house she asked if i would like a shot
it's gonna be a great weekend
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
I found his retainer in my ass crack. It smells like shame.
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
Well sundance is in town and Im going to use my one and only shot to bang Taylor swift... Does it count as a random if shes famous?
trust me, you don't know shame until you're in a peacock costume getting CPR by random dudes
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
Don't tell me you're on acid again
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
Was that you calling me at 4am asking to borrow a rubber ducky and a tampon?
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
He brought me a bottle of Jack, got me off 3 times, & then left. This is the best fakelationship ever!
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
Randomize
