Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
Holy fuck, spaghetti burritos are the best idea I've ever had.
My saliva right now is around 7.6% alcohol/volume.
Wait I'm all alone with a guy and his turtle
I spent the last 6 months operating under the assumption that I HADNT fucked a paramedic. I was wrong.
Oh I'm sorry does your girlfriend send you better pictures of things in her ass? No? Didn't think so. Remember that the next time you wanna complain how I don't make the first move enough.
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
nobody put me to bed and I ended up peeing on a tree and got written up
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
I made it out of the house. Success.
It's not better out here. I'm at Target hyperventilating in the aisles.
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
Randomize
