You can bone my sister, but I will end our friendship if you write 'LOLERS' one more time at the end of your texts.
is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
twelve hours since my last beer and i just blew a .08, time to go to the library
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
She sucked her thumb until she was 17. It's like my dick was born to be in her mouth.
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
Fixing to yell "you're too hot for her" at a Gerard butler look alike. There is absolutely no way this is going to end well...
I mean, I gave him a hand job on the Pearl Harbor tour bus; I don't know what the fuck else he wants out of this "relationship"
Yeah I was thinking something along the lines of "I almost died, lets celebrate with sex. Come over"
Heat not working dressed like an eskimo. A real one with a ski sock on my junk
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
Please don't try and hook up with one of your high school teacher's friends
The fact he has had a girlfriend for 5 years and they are trying to work it out isn’t going to stop me from sleeping with him. He said it himself you can’t cheat on someone you love...
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
Randomize
