whats up tonight?
Ice cream, wine, and teabags... Not the earl grey kind
Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
Favor? Can you not wear as much glitter on your face this time? Walking in the house looking like a disco ball was enough embarrassment for the week 😒
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
While I was sneeking out of her apartment, there was a giant cage with a parrot in it. I half expected it to squak "hit and run...hit and run."
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday
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