I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
Just got cockblocked by coyotes. This would happen to me.
Yeah he doesn't get it. We had to change the subject to Keanu reeves before someone got hurt.
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
Also, putting laundry hampers on my head and pretending I'm an astronaut is a good way to get caught in every door frame in the house.
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
I fucking love your mom. She's so drunk and fully functional. I aspire to be her one day.
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
Also CANADIAN LIPS TASTE OF MAPLE SYRUP AND APOLOGIES. SORRY.
Her tutu was on the floor and she wouldn't take off her crown. She kept saying you're fucking a princess!
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
That's just how I roll. I drink, then tell people I'm either not wearing underwear or I'm training to be a stripper.
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
Randomize
