im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
Ever since they found the bud they've been sending me visa gift cards instead of cash. Bastards.
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
My mom said "I don't want to fund your drug problem" so she gave me a gift card to the book store. I now have a 420 page book on growing weed.
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
No, I'm in the bathroom trying to scrub off the 16 tally marks on my wrist so its not so obviously to the world that I puked on a couch last night.
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
Drunk me forgot I'm not an 18yr old raver anymore. Adult me is now in pain.
I just finished a four mile round trip walk to CVS to buy shaving cream and lube. You're welcome.
Because I know nothing is hotter than ocean themed dick pics on SnapChat...
Every day I wake up and there is no spectacular morning wood waiting for me I get so sad.
just woke up and had to check if i still had pants on, i really need to stop drinking
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
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