ok i'm going to motor boat your sister now. ttyl
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
Just found the bucket list I wrote when I was high...somehow I dont think "jello swimming pool" is gonna happen.
Most eventful shower ever. Jacked off, peed and puked in there.
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
I was having trouble getting it up so she grabbed it and said "no, it's too big to fail"
I'm going to text my booty call and tell him nevermind, that I got the job finished by myself. That will teach him to text back faster.
This lesson is brought you by a psychology class.
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
My new successful method of booty calling is sending a screencap of a map with the shortest route from their location to mine highlighted.
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
I joined the mile high club last night. I ran a mile while high on coke. It was glorious
Went up to some dude that hit on Laura and told him he has a voice like a grandma. Apparently didnt have muscles or kindness like grandma so can you pick me up at the ER please?
Randomize
