my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
i just google imaged poop.
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
I told you I was good to drive
dumbass I drove... you sat in the passengers seat and steered with a paper plate
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
She straight up told me, "I don't care if he films as long as he's quiet." You sure you can't find the camera?
Can we agree to not tell mom about this?
This isnt even the most disappointing thing i know about you.
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
"you can only have my number if you answer all the questions on this trivial pursuit card correctly"
My passport was stamped in Canada two weeks ago. One step closer to uncovering wtf happened that night
FUCK and YOU. times 10. To infinity and beyond. You bastard. Worst. Cockblock. Ever. I'm going to nail your sister.
This is gonna be the kind of weekend where if it involves putting on pants, it ain't happening.
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
Randomize
