Get condoms and clear your schedule for the night. I'm bringing chinese food!
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
i feel like my life is a cheap remake of American Pie
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
I woke up with flowers, a tiara & pasta salad in my bed. Tequila makes me act like a fat Disney princess
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
You straight up wore me out. This should be a proud moment for you. It's almost like my penis is asking for a timeout. But not really
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
Do u ever find yourself high af, watching American ninja warrior and crying at the athletes stories?
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
Randomize
