I have a new drinking limit. I'll stop when I know I'm going to untag the picture that was just taken of me.
tonight is going to be epic. can you pre-book an ambulance?
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
Sorry for feeding you peanuts last night while you were sleeping, you looked hungry.
i got two bottles of merlot and sorrows to drown, you in??
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
Moral of the story: fuckboys never change
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
You know when you're a kid and you play at the pool until you passed out? It was like that except instead of playing it was sex.
Randomize
