therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
I'm riding shot gun after Shawn took a dump in a happy meal box because we were making record time.
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
So when I eventually, if ever, find someone I'd like to marry, do you think having people fly to africa for a lion king themed wedding is too much?
I found him in the kitchen singing German metal into a banana while simultaneously mixing brownie batter. He didn't have any pants on.
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
sometimes a perk of being a drug dealer is amazon gift cards. who knew?
That moment when your mom is so drunk she makes you get out of bed to lay in her bed because she thinks it feels like sleeping on a marshmallow peep....
You tried to ride his dick and fell off. Then tried to ride the floor. That's why he hasn't called back
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
I ate cake in bed. Felt great
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