So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
and next time when you feel me up, do it right
So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
Coming home soaking wet at three am and trying to convince the front desk man that we came from the library might have worked if I wasn't also roaring at everything.
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
I totally accidentally said "we don't go around hammering girls in the rear" in front of 132 5th graders today.
Youre attempt to ruin my night by putting Date Rape by Sublime on my sex playlist failed. She was into it.
I want a MapMyFart App, where I can mark every spot where I have ripped one. Like here.
Dude he downed 9 shots of tequila, sang bohemian rhapsody with 3 randoms Wayne's world style, solo'd closing time, chased the hot bartender's dog all the way to main, tackled him, carried him back, hot bar tender hugged AND kissed him, then he does a jumping heel click and leaps into my car through the window. Next rounds free at the yeti. Needless to say your little brother is a tequila god.
Basically.
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
Left my wallet at the store. Wouldn't have noticed if the joint I just rolled wasn't in it.
Randomize