Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
dude i dont realllllly have to fuck her do i? its just a mess down there and i think im gonna cry
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
What do you mean you don't want me to steal the manikin do you have any idea how expensive inflatable dolls are I can't get that for your birthday
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
I offered him midol and told him "it always helps my period so maybe it'll help yours"
The moment when you go to plug in someone else's phone in your car and your lube is in the way. Don't mind that it's just my center console car lube. Normal.
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
You told me you were going to invite all of your Tinder matches to the same bar on the same night and make them compete for your affection in a series of Lust Olympics. Winner gets laid.
were you aware we were supposed to be taking care of her hamster this weekend?
Randomize
