After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
Just had to explain to the nurse WHERE I have poison ivy. Great Day
I learned an important lesson last night: Jameson giveth, but Jameson also taketh away.
Cruelly.
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
I got cut off for calling the flower girl a slut. What are you doing?
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
I standby a snuggie being perfectly acceptable attire for drunkenly walking your dog at 5am. Our new neighbors did not seem to agree.
I didn't want sex last night, but she charmed my dick out of my pants like a snake charmer.
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
OMG I accidentally abducted a cat. Now there is a cat in my apartment. I NEED TO UNDO WHAT I HAVE DONE
Randomize
