Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
We got kicked out after you decided to chase your shot using the soda gun behind the bar.
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
I wonder if her husband knows I have my own drawer at the apartment
Trying to convince myself that everyone keeps staring at me because I'm pretty and not because of my hickies.
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
Masturbated before I came into work and now the finger scanner won't clock me in. Fuck Valentines Day.
I can measure my amount of vomit in solo cups.
I just smoked a joint and ate a sandwich while watching someone get arrested. Bonnaroo is a silly place.
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
I'm sorry you had to knock him out on your birthday. But that also means I won the bet that you'd hit someone so you owe me 40. dollars
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
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