I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
a stripper queefed in my friends mouth last night and it reminded me of you. miss you
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
Taking shots of gin by myself out of TMNT glasses and chasing with bites of chocolate cake. AMERICA.
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
ALso, saw an adorable man walking an adorable dog with his adorable kid.
And yes, that last sentence is biased because my ovaries started screaming
I'm staying at his house to solve the homeless situation. There's a freezer bag of weed in the fridge. He doesn't know it's there, and he's not missing it so I may have an income soon.
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
I JUST BROKE A NAIL MASTURBATING. WTF I could even enjoy my orgasm bc now I'm gonna have to spend $50 on my nails.
Honey...this isn't my 20's. This is my 30's. I paid for this house and these expensive ass sheets to fuck in them. Get your ass over here.
Randomize
