..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
please tell me i can get drunk off sparkling grape juice. even if you have to lie, please say yes.
Did you ask me to bring you a t-shirt to class or did I just dream that?
No, I did. It's a long story.
You get drunk and try to bury your girlfriend in the sand JUST ONCE and all hell breaks loose
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
Mitt romney looks like a fantastic lover (full disclorsure: im 76% vodka right now)
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
I just came inside of a Gatorade bottle. That hungover.
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
I think my liver has finally had enough and is going all Ashley-Judd-in-a-Lifetime-movie on me.
Randomize
