You also had the stripper slap the shit out of me for not having any money....remember that?
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
Dude feel your hair right now it feels so weird like pasta
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
Was almost hungover and got scared, skipped hungover, back to hammered. Fuck real life
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
I just walked away from a youth soccer tournament popping every birth control pill I had left in the pack.
i was trying to figure out what "tidy fucking" was when i realized he meant "titty fucking" and i need to start banging smarter people....
I'm going to bed early so football can come sooner
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
I'm not well. Although it could be worse.
My cousin is so hungover she quit her job.
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
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