dude totally just got the jungle juice out of my white top. i am really ready to be a trophy wife.
Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
Hey I have to teach you how to run in heels before vegas
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
My corndog is like a popsicle of bread. A WHOLE. POPSICLE. OF BREAD.
he told me he was watching a movie and he'd be over later and i asked how long. he said 8 inches give or take. you cease to amaze me with the guys you set me up with.
Okay wait let me power puke and then we can go dancing
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
i'm gonna friendzone myself so you dont have to
If he comes over I probably get to fuck him and if he doesn't I don't have to pay him the $60 I owe him for weed. It's a win-win situation.
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
Randomize
