i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
i just woke up i smell like fire, i have bruises on both knees and one elbow, i have a lighter and nip of smirnoff blueberry in my bed, rug burn on one hip and about 12 pics of you and me on my camera-this needs to stop happening
yea ive got to shower which is going to be painful given the skin burns from the blowup obstacle course races last night
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
How bad is the voicemail?
You graded my boobs.... C minus. Asshole.
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
Oh I will totally be your beard, but on one condition I get to watch you and your boy friend have sex.
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
Randomize
