id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
i dont remember who you are as you are in my phone as "mr. peanut."
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
Went home with a guy 2 " his house". Woke up this morn on couch to parents cooking breakfast, piss all over my back and he is no where to be found. That fuckr pissed on me and bounced. His parents are gonna think some drunk bitch pissed their couch.
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
Dude you can't like a status about me getting hit by a car
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober"
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
Oh my god. I just realized something amazing. If I get pregnant with a boy, that technically means I have a penis right??????
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
"Fwd: Nice to meet you last night thanks for the tit flash" no recollec. i am officially banned from wearing tube tops to the bar.
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
Randomize
