she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
The gyno asked how many partners i've had... I said ummmm she goes ok then i'll just put down ten.
You just kept insisting that you and the homeless man went way back, and that you bonded over how cold you both were.
I hope there's a soldier with a Bedazzler just going to town right now.
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
I take back all the times I've said life was unfair. I'm about to have two trained bartenders for a girlfriend and roommate
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
It's hard to talk dirty with a mouth full of peanut butter
I walked in on him fucking her whilst she ate skittles. I saw things no one should see, but I did get your bra back. You owe me.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
He was shirtless in my yard saying he was jesus
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
Randomize
