SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
Why do I always give away anal sex as birthday presents?
Shut up... one mans birthday cake is another mans sodomy my friend
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
My facebook horoscope today said I will have a little "confusion". Obviously astrology understands a blackout.
Its piss that you smell... I borrowed that shirt last week. Sooo, wanna grab some laundry soap on your way home? And good luck on your date.
She dropped a weight class after every shot I took. I thought I was just drink something magical.
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
The only people who have said happy valentines day to me today have been 2 homeless people.
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
Hope I didn't wake u up but I woke up and there is a shirt, boxers, belt and jeans on my balcony, along with a naked guy who claimed to scale the building
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
Randomize
