I went to blockbuster, where I always go when I need to soul searching
Despondent, hopeless, I decide on vantage point, because I vaguely resemble matthew fox (let me believe this, please)
It was cheaper to buy then rent, so now I'm stuck w/ a wretched hangover and I own this shit movie
I just came so hard I farted. Twice. Thank God I'm alone.
She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
just put a funnel in my mouth and pour the tequila in with a little emergen-c
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
I don't know if I should be scared or excited that I can officially drink vodka on the rocks like it's 7up.
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
Woke up the day after the party with a bruise on my stomach. Pretty sure my liver was trying to escape for fear of it's life.
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
He totally sucks at sexting. He sent me a clothed shot of his ass captioned "I know this gets you going." What?
just woke up with nickles taped to my body. theres like a dollar worth.
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
He’s like an awkward walking penis that has a personality attached
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