Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
She must have been at ribfest tonight because my dick smells like barbeque sauce
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
I'm seeing how long I can hold this wine in my mouth. I have so many adventures! I'm like Teddy Ruxpin!
Unfortunately hes not a hipster douchebag with no life goals, so naturally I'm not interested.
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
She drunkenly dropped her ranch for her pizza. She tried to clean it up with her hands off the street then realized it didn't work and started licking her fingers.
Don't remember our skype call last night too well, but did I pee while skyping you?
You randomly sent me a black Santa Claus emoji at 2am. I think alcohol was involved.
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
Don't make me do math I'm drunk and full of chicken
bonging vodka is the same level of "good idea" as eating machetes
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
Randomize
