Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
just next time i won't let coke make me think I'm superman and drink a shit ton.
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
Promise me you won't have sex in my room
I can't promise you that, but I promise you that I'll try
Might want to in your tub tho. That thing is fucking huge.
BABIES FOR EVERYONE. I'd be like Oprah except with babies
Also... I'm unsure what to do with my face while someone is choking me during sex. Like I feel like its hard to look flattering.
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
I want to disappear from this job like a fart in the wind.💨
Randomize
