Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
The last shot i remember taking was toasted to "love, sex, and magic". Needless to say I was 0 for 3 on that toast for the night.
please don't let me die tonight
what have you done for me lately?
Just deleted any ex boyfriends and potential lovers from my phone in preparation for Vegas...
why is my new profile picture on Facebook one of me with a bunch of strangers on an elevator?
I'm about to sell my hamster for weed money I'll call you in a few
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
Walking my dog and eating a taco in last night's dress.. Classy
Blow jobs in the hobby lobby parking lot, oh lawd there gonna pray for me when they review those tapes ...
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
just had a woman ask me to donate my eggs so that her baby could look like me. don't know whether to get a restraining order or be flattered. thoughts?
I haven't been single on my birthday for 7 years. If you don't get me laid tonight, your best friend/wing woman status will be revoked.
I just had a morning three-some with marijuana and a detachable shower-head
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
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