dude. I'm so drunk.
pete, this is bryce's mom
I can't wait to have my cock in your ass
pete, this is still bryce's mom
They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
I cannot believe you needed a note to remind yourself to ask me about the fourteen sleeping Mexicans.
Hey I have to teach you how to run in heels before vegas
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
you know...the drug dealer i named my baby after.
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
Ok. So let me get this straight. She treats her vagina like a clown car, yet judges me for just making out with the guy that bought all of us shots?
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
EMERGENCY FRIEND CRISIS: WE HAVE TOO MUCH WHISKEY. ABORT HANGING OUT WITH MELISSA, RECOMMEND TO HANG OUT WITH OUR WHISKEY INSTEAD
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
drunkkkkk be here I heart you
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