If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
Turns out they use me as an example of What Not To Do at freshman orientation. My little brother told me.
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
Shoot me. Guy hitting on me with a beaver on his head. Says it is his spirit animal.
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
Well I knew we were drunk when I told you it was a good idea to shit in the ocean
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
Apparently I walked to Denny's in the pouring rain without shoes just socks last night. Excellent.
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
You know you were way drunk when you wake up at 7 AM halfway on a couch, tangled in a sheet with your shoes still on.
I forgot about snapchatting a pic of us, but I remember flossing with your hair.
We were like ok let's be eachothers maid of honor and then you were like "ok see you at the wedding" and walked away
I think I need to start sobriety testing my Tinder dates.
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
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