does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
Ha Ha the cop that just pulled me over would like me to tell you hi!
I wanna tell red shirt guy I'm pregnant and use the abortion money for Coachella.
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
I woke up and he was starring at me and then said "do you believe in miracles"?
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
Randomize