i miss vodka and anonymity. college is so rich in both. in college we are a many armed creature, lubricated with beer and sex.
non applicator tampons are so hard to put in when your drunk. i fingered myself for 10 minutes and forgot what i was trying to do.
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
She vajazzled her vag. It was as useless as putting earrings on chewbacca
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
Just found the cutest bag of coke under my bed. I'm going to get fucked up and bleach the cat vomit out of my sheets.
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
And I wasn't prepared because its been a very long and lonely season and I wasn't expecting to find dick at Press Box trivia night....
I'm sorry for aggressively singing the Frasier theme song at you so many times last night.
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
So that prostitue I banged at Steve's bachelor party just texted and invited me to a BBQ at her parents. Never again doubt the power of the cock piercing.
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
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