I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
highlight of my day: just saw a crying girl get dropped off at home wearing only socks, booty shorts, and a dirty wifebeeter. I wonder what happened to the costume...
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
Getting business cards printed for tonight. Would you rather be: 1. Vice President of Argentina 2. Celebrity Dental Assistant or 3. Dial-Up Internet Technician
3. Dial-Up Internet Technician.
Monday: I just need a drink Tuesday: OMG no more this week! Wednesday: oh shit how'd I get drunk Thursday: I'm glad you've stopped the pretenses
I'm just planning on experiencing Disney as adult style as it gets. Drinking bloody mary's at dawn and telling all the kids waiting in lines how badly their future sucks and that Santa isn't real.
when your 30 and im 37 and we're lonely and single, lets make a pact to murder each other.
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
I forgot how easy it is to have sex in public when you're wearing a dress. Thank you global warming.
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
How is it that I know 4 different bartenders who won't charge me for drinks, but I can't get laid?
Randomize
