kristin has been a bad kristin
god help us all. i just saw an infant wearing a onesie that said "i don't know who my daddy is"
Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
i had a dream last night that my liver tore its self out of my body and ran away.
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
She called him at 5 AM so that he'd be ready for her birthday breakfast and drinks at 6. This is why people don't need to wait until their 21st to have their first drink.
I'm going out w/ her for her b-day in a bit. I just talked to one of her drunk friends on the phone who asked if I could "handle 7 lesbian." This could be interesting.
I'm going to a one year olds birthday party to smoke weed. What has my life become.
I better make out with at least 3 princesses and 4 animals this weekend.
Realizing life ain't all about burritos and strippers, it's a struggle out there, and it ain't looking pretty so far,..
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
how do you politely tell someone their toddler looks alarmingly similar to the berries and cream guy
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
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