break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
My autobiography is now tentatively titled "I'm Fucking the DJ, and Other Ways to Party for Cheap"
Me focusing on not shitting my pants is keeping me awake.
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
My nose hurts from that stripper beating me with her tits
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
I have the perfect view of a sexy blonde in yoga pants stretching from the shoulder press machine. I'll be here all night. So glad I came high.
Ur here with me in spirit. Now run free. Run free
If your mother gets up on the bar again, I will. The bouncer already had a talk with her earlier.
The ratio of last drink to last smoke is so tricky. This could go on until the booze is gone
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
After 3 parties, all of them busted, and 4 field sobriety tests, I AM the cop whisperer
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
Randomize
