But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
I may have told her we're dating for a handjob, Fake tits are overrated.
My unemployment check should really just be direct-deposited into the checking account of my drug dealer
Add "its too hot" to reasons why I don't get fucked anymore
I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
She literally got down on all fours and I swear did a 360 degrees head rotation exorcist barf...and then moaned IT WAS THE TACO BEEEELLLLLL
so no, not her best night
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
He asked me how france is treating me
Tell him you got so much dick you may never come back to the US. That ought to keep him away
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
I'm sorry I've been mean recently but tbh it really turns me on seeing you cry so it might happen a lot..... You're a pretty crier I don't get it
We were literally making dick jokes with his dick out
That’s the level of friends with benefits I aspire to achieve
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
Randomize
