Im drinkin out of a coconut! I think im gonna dip my balls in it!
she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
There are so many birds around me. And squirrels. I feel like that chick from Enchanted...but like if she had a dick and made poor life decisions.
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
all we have is white fucking wine this is a travesty it's christmas not a fucking funeral
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
Hypothetically speaking how does one remove a lamp that they hypothetically superglued to the ceiling?
Acetone nail polish remover, and you lied about studying last night didn't you?
Oh definitely.
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
I just learned that the grill marks on a Burger King burger patty are actually previously burnt on there with a radioactive spray-on liquid and McDonald's french fries are actually 5% potato.
Randomize
