You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
She wouldn't stop telling me the story of the penis and how she got laid.
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
Who was that couple sleeping in your bed with us last night?
You just want to fuck a girl in a dinosaur costume, don't you?
Whoever decided to wrap my shins in duck tape owes me new leg hair.
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
Well, we broke up and instead of putting my shit out on the curb like a normal person, she fucking donated everything to Goodwill. So now I have to pay two dollars for one of my own t shirts.
I've been asked to reupholster their slam-couch so I found some off-cuts of medical-grade, hermetically sealed fabric. She'll be slammed upon for generations to come.
Sorry for trying to baptize you last night
You knew the entire thing in Latin I was so impressed
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
Randomize
