did you get engaged???
Convinced the bartender that I'm a congressman. Free Drinks. God bless America.
When you get home we need to compare our schedules and set up masturbation slots. I'm scares of you walking in on me. Again.
Just realized how many men I've had sex with for the first time in St. Patty's Day past. Currently sending "HAPPY SEXIVERSARY" texts...
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
I feel like I have two modes: Super fuckin high, or super giddy from caffeine. I have learned to accept this.
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
I just saw a herd of slutty loofahs run down the street...
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
So i just remembered that thing i use to do with your butt because of shark week.
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
Randomize