make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
i wish starbucks made bloody marys
why are there beer bottles in my dishwasher?
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
she gave me one of those friendship bracelets and said as long as I wore it it was like an all-access pass to her vagina
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
So, I had a dream last night that involved you as an actual cloaked Captain America and a lot of weird sex, and I didn't hate it.
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
Jack and I got in a huge fight at 6am. He fell asleep when I was giving him head so I freaked. We were both black out so I made a memo in my phone reminding me
The whole country is going to hell in a handbasket but I got a grade A fucking and don't particularly care.
Randomize
