You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
Glitter + Penis = Best. Idea. Ever.
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
I smoked weed with pregnant girl. I'm going to hell.
somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs
We bought home drug tests to see which of us could make it look more like a kaleidoscope. What happened to the days of innocent fun trying to best everyone with a breathalyzer?
Apparently it's illegal to hit pedestrians with coke cans... But the cop complimented my arm. That's a win in my book.
It's because of weed that I don't mind driving an hour to visit my family. And it's because of you that there's weed in my life. Thank you.
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
I feel like it should at least be like a "hey look I'm actually fine that I drunkenly gave you my virginity!" friend request.
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
Beer. Pizza. Seething Rage. I will be full of two of these things tonight. You get to decide which two.
I'll tell you all about it in person but let's just say the big dick fairy must really like me right now
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