u know whats better than using ur vibrator? using it w/ jeopardy on in the background and half moaning the correct final jeopardy question. yeah that just happened.
My cat puked at the same time as me. Makes me feel better about myself, except he can stand and I can't.
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
There is a woman in the bar breastfeeding a baby. Doing shots. Gotta love maryland Applebees.
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
I am the image of restraint, it's why im just hungover and not in the hospital
I WILL go to space. And if we find aliens I WILL fuck one. It’s the Marine Corps way
Randomize
