I feel like a panda just shit rainbows on my mind
Michael Jackson and Farah Fawcett are dead
NOOOOOOOO not MJ! Someone tell the paramedic to grab him by the heart and just "Beat it"
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
I finally beat you i just fucked my professor last night!!!\n\n
sry, psychiatrist trumps professor
At the bar dressed as a taco. not a typo. Come down.
She said she's saving anal for marriage cuz she has to save something for her husband...seriously just caught myself lookin at rings.
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
I woke up with a dick pic from the ex-Mormon via email. Not really what I wanted to see before my first cup of coffee this morning, but I gotta say, I'm impressed.
All I want is a wedding with a dress and a veil and where I can go and my cat can go.
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
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