There needs to be a term for a female version of a rusty trombone
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
the only thing i remember last nigh is talking to some chick for thirty minutes about cheese.
Turned out the thing on the lampshade was a bloodstain, not a bedbug. We feel much safer now.
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
Dude. I am seriously trying SO hard not to be amused by Honey Boo Boo. But the fact is, she just got a mani pedi with her gay uncle Poodle, and he got a discount because he only has nine toes, and I am ALL IN.
I'll check it out in the morning. Tonight has been reserved for getting baked and covering myself in kittens because THAT IS AN OPTION.
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
If you are breathing, I want you at your house. No non-breathing-related excuses.
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
idk but im stoned n hiding in the bathroom from my kids with a really big bowl of really little candy bars
Randomize
