when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
Ever got a vibrator stuck in ur hair? Is worse that getting ur hairbrush stuck.
...well that sucks.
I want to fuck you with a popsicle till it melts then eat it out of you
Really.
i want the original willy wonka imagination song to come on when i take a girl to my room
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
He got up in the middle of the show and returned with this massive ham shank, then offered me some by asking "wanna suckle on my hog." Should I be offended?
On a scale of 1 to shit show you were "i just pissed myself"
Did I tell you I’m going on a date? His name is Michael and we both like dinosaurs and anal.
Dude what happened last night?
I don't know, I'm still trying to figure out how I got my clothes back on.
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
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