Turns out you can't chew it over with twix in real life
Dude I've never seen anyone get slapped that hard
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
No I am not eating basil off your cock
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
Sat down on an escalator. That hungover.
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
I see your creepy poodle photo and raise you a shirtless elderly gentleman who looks like a yetti in cutoffs who may or may not have an ENORMOUS erection.
.... touche....
Pinterest knows I’m getting divorced
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
I just got a text from a stranger offering to shave my asshole. I've been sober and out of town for a week, are you using my number as a dial-a-dumping again?
Not sure she's stomping around my apartment muttering incoherently about wanting to speak to the colonel
Randomize
