how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house
You suck. You're fired. I need to find a less reasonable voice-of-reason.
Also txt me when you take your first dump of the year... I'd like to synchronize if that's at all possible.
Thanks i'm proud of you and I'm proud of beer and vodka for making me drunk
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
We fed him just...so many bright colored crayons when he was blacked out. I hope he looks at his shits because this could be all for nothing
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
Gramp just called her sex-on-a-stick. AKA HE CALLED HER A WHORE. My 75 year old grandfather just called your ex's new thing a whore.
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
Some mornings I close deals. Other mornings I puke out my window while I’m driving down the highway
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
Randomize
