wat bout pragnant strippers??
i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
so last night my mother drunkenly told me that maybe the reason why I want to be a vet was because I was conceived doggy style.
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
Then he took his girlfriend's fuzzy handcuffs and locked me to their bed. Key is in an unknown location. He's surprisingly idiotic, for being premed.
I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
LSD in a sugar cube. Dropped it in my whiskey sour and felt like I was rowing a boat.
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
The Winnie the Pooh costume was great until you got drunk and started yelling at the kids asking for pictures.
whose parrot is this?
being single and having a boyfriend 300 miles away is eerily similar. never skipped a beat eating hot wings in my bed with no pants or masturbating every day.
I just watched an intern spill two trays of coffee inside a spinning door
Best exit from a building ever
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
Randomize