Earlier, I saw a homeless man that looked like Abe Lincoln, and I just saw a guy walk past wearing crocs and socks. I'm beginning to like this city less and less
Hey sorry about saying i hated you. it was the coke and the ice cream.
I just cut my nipple shaving
you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
I consider it a good night. I met Jimmy Buffet, who grabbed my ass, and I body-checked a toddler. She had it coming.
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
I told my therapist about the other night and he actually whistled and said "wow that is not good."
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
Dude on the shuttle bus eating a Butterfinger and watch porn on his phone and doesn’t give a fuck who knows
We need to get on his level
Randomize
