I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
i just walked into thanksgiving and three people in a row asked me who i was. really?
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
everyone thought he was too sick to make it, but he showed up. Ten minutes in and he's doing vodka shots with nyquil chasers
trading diseases for a hangover? that's either a really good decision or a really, really bad one. we'll find out if he wakes up tomorrow
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
There's a ton of international students in my suite and I'm just sitting in this chair with no pants on eating frosted flakes
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
I want my tombstone to read "making poor life decisions since 1993"
What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.
I got titty fucked last night and you're breastfeeding your newborn. Clearly we have gone two totally different paths since 2011.
it'll be like the notebook except for with way more of my penis
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
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