omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
i just jacked off to lindsey vonn, i feel so patriotic
USA! USA! USA!
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
I'm drinking wine alone, eating leftovers, and cleaning my sex toys. For the love of god, do not graduate.
I'm in a waiting room at the hospital - and there's a dude here who is WAY too proud of his urine sample.
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
Randomize
